How to find the home that’s within you

“It was when I stopped searching for home within others and lifted the foundations of home within myself I found there were no roots more intimate than those between a mind and body that have decided to be whole.” Rupi Kaur

Renovations

I came across this quote recently and it struck a chord within me as I was once that broken little girl, teenager, young adult in search of “home” when home was always right there within me. When I read Rupi’s quote it was as if a light bulb went off. Ahhhh so that’s what happened. Unwittingly Rupi Kaur scripted my sentiments.

I’ve often found myself trying to pin point that exact moment or moments that led to my metamorphosis. The moment when I accepted myself with all my hang ups, weaknesses, and insecurities. The moment I realized that there was strength, confidence and beauty under my issues. I just needed to scrape off the old layers — renovate my “home”.

You’re enough

When I shared this quote on Instagram I was amazed at how many people it resonated with. Karissa Allen admitted to how difficult it was to put it into practice. While Nikkia Hall shared that “we need to look at what is in front of us and nurture what’s there!” They are both so right! As much as we know, or hear about self-love and self-acceptance making that step, or in some cases that leap is hard. Because, though slavery is abolished many of us are still chained by our own insecurities, hang ups and fears of not being enough. Well I am here to tell you that you are more than enough!!!!

You’re right, I don’t know what you’ve been through, nor do I know your story. However, we all have a story, we all have scars. I know too that as mature and pulled together and confident that I am if I allow myself to think of what was, I’ll be a crumpled ball of pain. But the key words in Rupi’s quote are — “decided to be whole.” So, it’s a conscious decision that you make to no longer be a victim, or waddle in self-pity, or think that your ____________________ is not good enough.

Instead of being a victim:

Face your insecurities head on

No matter what they are acknowledge that you have them and deal with them. I’ve shared before how self-conscious I was about always being so skinny and my full lips. I used to wear baggy clothes to hide my size. I was probably 25 when I accepted that I was always going to be skinny and embraced my size.

Love yourself

The Bible tells us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. Believe that!

Accept yourself

It’s easy to look at other people and wish we had their ________________ . Well stop it! Embrace the you that you are.

Believe in yourself

I may believe in myself a tad too much as I really believe there is nothing I can’t do. Ha! It may take me longer than another and I may have to google it but I’m going to get it done!

Don’t allow anyone to mistreat you

We give people the blueprint on how to treat us when we accept or reject certain behaviors. Don’t give anyone power or permission to treat you any less than you deserve.

Protect your home

Once you’ve decided to be whole, don’t let anyone chip at your foundation, break your windows or damage your “home” in anyway.  Read self help books, find a therapist or journal your thoughts.